Thursday, December 29, 2011

Soldier's Pay--A Book Review




  I have something to admit to the HTH audience that I have kept to myself for sometime and really only Mel knows this. I have only read about 20 Faulkner short stories and now only one novel. (Audible Gasp!) Several years ago, one of my many arch-nemesis' (The Oprah Book Club) came out with the Summer of Faulkner set and it seemed like beloved William was everywhere, but I didn't see anyone buckled down and actually reading it, which added insult to injury for me. It did however sell a lot of copies for the grandchildren of Faulkner. I was complaining about the whole situation and Mel gave me some tough love. She listened to my rantings as she so patiently does and then asked in her quiet way, how much of Faulkner had I really read? The answer was not very much save the very popular short story, A Rose for Emily, that we all read in 10th Grade American Literature. So, I did what every bibliophile does, I used my nearest Barnes and Noble gift certificate and bought the whole set of William Faulkner novels put out by the Library of America. And I also picked up the two, comprehensive short story collections that have been published. And there they sat for the next four years. I would read a few short stories here and there and then tell myself that I'm not ready to read a novel yet. That changed about two months ago. I was finished with a book and looking for something next when I decided to pull the proverbial trigger, I grabbed the first Faulkner edition which contains his main works from the years 1926-1929 and began to read. The first book in the edition is his first published novel, Soldier's Pay.
 
Soldier's Pay is William Faulkner's first publish novel, but not his first published work. The Marble Faun, a collection of poems, was his first real published work of note. The novel was written in 1926 long before he became the pillar of American Literature that he has become known as. The story in short is about Donald Mahon, an American soldier who had gone to England to become an RAF pilot during the First World War before America entered the conflict. He gets shot down and terribly injured. His family is told he is dead, but then is shipped home from a foreign hospital. The novels begins with a group of very rowdy America soldiers who have missed the conflict all together due to the length of time it takes to train an army and the fact that America was only involved in WWI for a very short amount of time. (This same thing happened to a young, William Faulkner and  F. Scott Fitzgerald). The soldiers are riding back home on a train and giving the porters a very hard time. On this train, we meet two of the main character's, Joe Gilligan, a regular infantry soldier, and Cadet Lowe, a pilot who never saw action and is severely depressed about it. As they make their way across the country and back home to their respective homes, they run into a helpless, wounded pilot (Donald Mahon) and a young, beautiful widow, Mrs. Powers, who they both fall madly in love with. And they all decide to escort him and help his family out as they try to welcome their son, who is a shadow of the man he used to be, back into their lives. The rest of the novel is the story of their trip, their arrival to Mahon's home and town, his father's reaction to get back his shell of a son after he was thought dead, the town's reaction to his return when their other sons did not, and finally the drama that entails when it becomes known that he (Mahon) was engaged to a young, and seemingly promiscuous Miss Cecily Saunders, who is no longer interested in Mahon now that he is damaged goods. The novel does contain several secondary characters, like Januarius Jones, who is an easy one to love to hate, but the main story sticks with the primary characters.

   This is not a strange story, but rather one that many young Americans experienced because America at the time was practicing the Isolationist Doctrine, believing that if we just left everyone alone and dealt with our own domestic problems, then no one would bother us or the world at large. (Sound familiar?) If you've ever watched every girl's second favorite movie Pearl Harbor, a young Ben Affleck does just this very thing during the Second World War because America had gone back to being an Isolationist country and wanting to stay out of any conflict and once again deal with just our own domestic problems then everyone will just leave us alone. This experience, the one of becoming an RAF pilot, is one that Faulkner knew well because he did the same and is able to write about it with vivid detail.

    This novel was not an easy read. Often times, I would have to read a section several times before I understood exactly what was happening and to whom. It is written very similarly to how Fitzgerald's first, This Side of Paradise, is in that it is goes from mental thoughts to dialogue and real time actions, past, present and future all at once and then contains poems and letters dispersed throughout. To be honest, I almost gave up on it several times, but am so glad I did not. It was not particularly a great read. However, the ache of the father in beholding his injured son (This was Donald, my son. He is dead.) was so vivid and raw that it brought me to tears several times and the frustration of Gilligan with everyone's reaction to the war, to Donald, and finally to him is one that is echoed in many of the American writer's of the 20's and still feels fresh if you listen to a returning soldier from Iraq or Afghanistan. And lastly the need to feel like you are worth something and doing something that matters was also very strongly written through the character of Mrs. Powers. And her ache for the soldier she married on impulse due to his shipping off and then the loss of him so shortly afterwards is also very strongly written.

   Books like this aren't fun to read, but that is exactly the real reason for literature is it? I feel I learn so much about writing and America just by reading them. I would suggest reading this because I feel you will also learn as I did. It will also let you follow Faulkner's progression from the timid writer of poems to the master craftsman that he would become (or so as I've heard).

Happy reading and now onto his second novel, Mosquitoes,

  David

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Outer Dark--A Book Review



   If you read most of the accolades concerning or about author Cormac McCarthy, you begin to wonder if everyone has believed the hype that they, themselves have generated. However, it will only take one book for you to know that most of what they say is not hyperbole, but honest summations about the writings of McCarthy. I have only read five McCarthy novels and am not a partaker of vast amounts of books written after 1970, but out of the authors I have had a chance to read, McCarthy is one of the best and when it comes to true, neo-gothic (not Goth) fiction, he may be the best, but as mentioned elsewhere, I'm only an amateur reader.

   Outer Dark, his second novel, is no exception. It is simply the story (a very disturbing one at that) of a young woman who bears her brother's child, the brother abandons the newborn in the woods to die in shame and continued evilness, the baby is taken by a tinker, then he (both brother and tinker) flee, and then the mother sets about on a perilous journey through the countryside to find her baby. As with each McCarthy novel I've read there is a very real sense of justice and a dark feeling as a whole that at times becomes heavy and burdensome to the reader. At the same time as the main plot, there is a secondary plot that includes three terrifying and elusive strangers that haunt the same countryside bringing both horror and McCarthy uses them as his swift and terrifying (almost to an Old Testament level) hand of justice. 

    The book is only 242 pages long, but like the other McCarthy novels that I've read, they stay with you for a long time. He writes in a way where the dialogue feels authentic and real, the scenes are scenes you have either actually observed as well or can imagine, and the reactions and actions of the characters seem to be that of real humans. To me, this story felt like an rugged, southern Appalachian version of Silas Marner without the happy ending, but also was very unique in every way. 

     McCarthy is oft-compared to William Faulkner and I haven't read enough Faulkner to know if this fits or not, but I do know that currently there are very few writers that can even be, or should be mentioned in the same sentence with him. He and his writing appear to be cut from the same cloth of the American writers of a much earlier time and talent. Each page takes you to places and makes you the reader interact with characters that you will think about long after you have finished the book. I would think it would be nearly impossible to read a McCarthy novel and not find yourself trying to come to terms with yourself and the book as a whole. This to me is real writing. It is not an easy task for either author or reader to partake in. 

     I won't ruin the ending of the book for you, but only say it is a very good read. His description of the landscapes and persona that dot the southern Appalachians are almost second to none that I've read as of late. I will say that you should use caution when reading McCarthy. It will be neither easy nor will it be one that you can close, put back on the shelf, and never think about again. It will disturb you and cause you to try to solve something mentally that you just won't be allowed to do. 
Read away, but show caution,

   David



Friday, December 23, 2011

Born to Run--A Book Review



  Born to Run recounts the author, Christopher McDougall's quest to answer the simple question, " Why does my foot hurt?". He tried to get this answered because everytime he tried to run, he ended up getting injured in some way or another. He went to specialist after specialist and followed the advice of each one and their solutions and would after a time still end up getting injured. This does not surprise me because if you hang around with a group of runners long enough, then you will soon find that the conversation will most likely find its way to everyone's long laundry list of running injuries. And I'm not free from this, I usually get injured due to running at least once every year (I'm currently nursing an Achilles's injury that I sustained back in late October). This also does not surprise me since runners are using their bodies and demanding from it like few others. If this were cars we were talking about, then it would all make sense: the vehicles being used the most are the ones that need to be worked on, tuned up, replacement parts, etc. the most. 
   
  However, all of this was unacceptable to McDougall. He was tired of the circular logic of: How come my foot hurts? Because running is bad for you. Why is running bad for you? Because it makes your foot hurt. He loved to run. He felt that it brought together a human's " two greatest primal impulses: fear and pleasure. We run when we're scared, we run when we're ecstatic, we run away from our problems and run around for a good time." (Pg. 11) So, McDougall digs as deep as he has to dig in order to find a real remedy. In his digging, he recounts the two big running booms in the USA, before the Great Depression and the 70's boom, the good and the very bad about running shoe companies, the estimated reasons why primative man ran at all, and why modern man still feels the urge to run, but ended up getting injured. And all of this leads him to the Tarahumara, a tribe that lives in the Copper Canyon region of Mexico and lives as it did thousands of years ago and routinely runs 100 mile races and the older one gets, the better he/she gets which is directly opposite of what we currently think and see.

   This book is a great read and I'm so glad it was given to me (Thanks, Mom!). It is 281 pages long, but it only took me a week or so to read it and I'm a slow reader and only to get to read at lunch on occasion or at night before I fall asleep. McDougall does a wonderful job of showing the joys of running. And his recounting of each of the characters he meets along his way is very thorough and a joy to read. His play by play account of his motley crew's journey down to the Copper Canyons in order to race the Tarahumara is one of the best pieces of sport journalism that I've read in a while. 

  The two weak points of the book are his constant wondering of why a company like Nike would rather make money than make consistently, good products. I am not sure where this mindset comes from, but know it is one that is shared by an eerily large portion of the American population. Companies are formed to make money. Yes, it would be nice in a perfect world that those said companies showed great ethics and put the consumer and the consumer's health first, but that would require two things: an informed consumer who demanded those things and a business that found it profitable to meet that consumer in the middle and neither of these show up much in the real world. Companies are formed to make money. End of story for better or worse. Companies that survive the test of time are those that are able to do so and on more occasions than not, put the customer first by making quality dependable products. And the second weak point is all of Chapter 28. It takes all of the theory of primitive man evolving into what it is now today to a whole new level. McDougall includes the chapter because it helps enforce his theory: mankind was built to run and running shoes have slowed us down and injured us. However, to me, this is a weak place to go. He could have used the data (real) and made a very strong case alone without going to several scientists and their theories that have no real scientific (observable, measurable, repeatable) proof and then using it as facts. I know this is used all the time, but this is not real science. 

    I really enjoyed reading this book and may reread it. It makes you really want to throw off your shoes and go running or in the least, it makes you want to lace up and run for hours. McDougall is a gifted writer because he makes even lab data a breeze to read. This book is given credit for the whole "barefoot running" craze which can now be seen all over the place with the Vibram Five Fingers and all the other "minimalist" shoes that every company is now coming out with. I am all for people getting out and running, but I hate to see people accept something hook, line, and sinker without really thinking about it. Mankind may have run barefoot a long time ago, but nothing in 2011 is like it was even 50 years ago. You rarely see people, even small kids, without shoes. Humanity as a whole is a lot bulkier than they were. Almost all jobs are sedentary now. The human body is not used to the strain and impact of running unshod especially in an urban setting, which most of us find ourselves in. So, within this "minimalist theory" there are many unforeseen areas for possible injuries. 

   I have now coached three seasons of cross country since this book has come out and have had multiple runners and their parents who have jumped head first in to this new running craze/theory/trend only to find themselves injured with knee aliments, bad cuts from running on concrete that has glass in it, and broken toes. I am all for trying to find new and healthier running options, but I always think caution should be shown before diving head first into an unproven theory. 

  My favorite portions of this book have to do with the idea of character and how running builds it. I have always felt this while running and while coaching. Accomplishing something as a runner seems to have a wondrous effect on an individual. Each runner, no matter the level or talent, has to dig from some unknown place to find the strength, zeal, endurance, etc to reach a new height. McDougall discusses this in great detail towards the latter part of the book as he learns from both the Tarahumara and from the examples of the likes of ultra-running legend Scott Jurek that running is about much more than winning races and besting world records. He even comes to the point of writing, "the reason we race isn't so much to beat each other, but to be with each other...it's easier to get outside yourself (perform outside of your perimeters) when you're thinking about someone else..." (pg 253). I feel this is so very true whether it is in running or in every other area of life. 

Read the book. It is worth your time. Find an open grassy field, take your shoes off, and run like you did when you were a kid, but please watch for glass or roots.

  David

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

My Take on the Netflix Debacle



   I realize as usual that I'm about a month or more behind on this, but I am still seeing things here and there about it. So, I still feel it is okay to speak about it. If you aren't sure exactly what I'm talking about, I'll bring you up to speed as quickly as possible. It goes very simply like this: Netflix emerges as a DVD straight to your home company for a nominal fee, business grows like wildfire, they (Netflix) increase their services and capabilities while not increasing their fees by much, business explodes, they (Netflix) offer great customer service, quick returns, and once again increase their services by offering streaming shows, movies, and documentaries straight to your television all while only increasing their prices by a small fee, business grows faster than the H1N1 paranoia, and several years go by, all while the aforementioned items continue and their stock prices sore, then they increase their fees by some "absurd" rate, customers get violently angry, their CEO apologizes through a mass email, decides to split the company into two different companies depending on their services (DVD rental vs. Streaming), customers go several steps beyond violent outrage, they lose large amounts of customers, the CEO apologizes again once again by mass email, and they lose more customers, reduce their rates by a small amount, offer more services, and go back on the idea of splitting the company into two, separate companies, and still they lose customers, and now are left with a struggling company, cheap stock, and a bad name. That is where we stand today.

  I am going to say that I'm at a loss for exactly what went wrong. Maybe someday, someone will explain it all to me slowly. Mel and I have been loyal Netflix customers since 2008. We moved to Macon and couldn't afford cable and the idea of joining the Netflix Nation came to me in a vision at night (Please know this is no joke.)When we jumped aboard the Netflix train, the fee was $7 or $8 dollars a month and this allowed us to watch one DVD at a time and also watch anything we wanted via their website. Santa via Nana gave us a ROKU box in 2009 and we really became huge fans of Netflix! We now could stream almost any show, movie, documentary, etc straight to our television. It was as close to magic as either of us have come. We have been in this frenzied state since then and we currently pay $16.95 a month for both the constant, truly unlimited streaming and the one DVD at a time. Now this is where I'm at a loss and let me explain:

       1. The price of cable t.v. continues to go up so much and I never hear a public cry for justice from any large group of people. Cable is the reason we couldn't afford cable when we moved to Macon. We had purchased cable in Dothan at a low entrance fee of $60 dollars a month and by the time we left it was nearing the $180 mark and our services had not changed, customer service was terrible, and we had to sign a two year contract, which they wouldn't let us out of when we moved, so we had to pay for cable that someone else was watching several hundred miles away and we had no choice. I know my experience is not an outlier for those who have cable or satellite. But this is not the same with Netflix. If I hated it, I could just quit it today and walk away. If we moved, I could just transfer the services to my new address.

   2. Our cell phone bill is supposed to be around $80 a month, but let me say this very clearly....OUR CELL PHONE BILL IS NEVER $80 A MONTH...NEVER. And our services never get better, customer service gets worse, the bills become more and more confusing, etc. But once again, I don't hear the public cry for justice and I don't see little snippets of rage on Yahoo or anywhere else. I do hear unhappy people talk, but we are all trapped behind our two year contracts and the nonexistent dream of ...."someday it will be like it said it would be..." And once again, I say this is nothing like our Netflix experience. If the fee is changed, then we get a clear reason for the change and it usually means the services to us have increased and things are so much better. Not so with Verizon or any other behemoth of a cell phone company.

   3. The price of a movie ticket is too expensive. There is just so many things wrong with it costing near $30 for two people to go see one, 1, una movie that we would have to pay for again in order to watch it again and share a Coke and a popcorn. Yet, I only see fees increasing with little to no grumbling, complaining, mass outrage, etc. I don't see emails in my inbox from the CEO's of film companies, movie outlets, etc begging for my forgiveness because things have gotten out of hand. I only see the prices going up and the movies getting shorter and me wanting to see them less and less. Netflix is nothing like this.

  I could keep naming examples, but I will save you from that. I just don't get the outrage and almost cataclysmic public backlash. Why? Maybe someday I'll understand. Maybe.

Continuing to try and understand the world around me,

  David




Monday, December 19, 2011

2011 Foot Locker Cross Country Champoinship-Review and Results.

  This year's Foot Locker XC Championship races were some of the best they've ever had. The boy's race was anyone's race for about a half mile, but then quickly became a battle of human limits between the two stars of high school cross country running (Edward Cheserek and Futsum Zeinasellassi), both who were born in Africa, but have matriculated to schools here in the USA. And the girl's race was one of the gutsiest races I've ever watched thanks to the front-running antics of a very courageous and feisty high school runner named Erin Finn who didn't win, but gave everything I've ever seen given in a race.
  The runner that I was rooting for the most was little Grace Tinkey from Macon, Georgia. I helped coach her for three years along with several other more-gifted coaches that I learned a lot from. She came in 6th in this year's race, which bested her 14th place finish last year. But for the majority of the race, she was holding steady in the front pack in third.I know she will be back next year and I'm going to be pulling for her again. She deserves the best and am so proud of the runner and person she has become.
    I watched the races from the comforts of my couch and living room, but did not stay seated long during either race. During a regular race that my runners are in, I spend each race running to the mile marks watching their progress and cheering for them as they overcome themselves and in the end overcome their highest expectations. I missed running around during the race, so I instead ran around the couch and cheered the runners on. Lady and Jack quickly grew tired of my antics and went upstairs to sleep, but I did not let that bother me. But I will let you decide what kind of races they were. Watch the races. They are amazing.




The Boys Results




The Girls Results

Happy Running,

         David

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Some Weekend Humor



   As I've posted here before, I am surrounded by hundreds of students everyday and someone is always saying something that is really funny. It is often hard to keep my composure and sometimes, I don't do a very good job at this. Somethings are just too funny or too hard to ignore.Here are some of the latest. Enjoy.

I want to watch NCIS so bad right now.

I really want the new Zelda game for Christmas. I'm not too sure what I'll do if I don't get it.

  After answering a question about college computer labs that came from out of nowhere during a lecture about igneous rocks. This was one of the responses:
  
   They had computers when you were in college, Mr. Dark? 
   Yes. Computers came out in the 70's. 
   I thought you were older than that. 
   I'm only 32. 
   Oh.

Another response:

    Mr. Dark, why are you talking about Apple computers? Do they even make them anymore?
    Yes, Apple is the company that makes everything from iPods, iPhones, and all the Mac books. That's why all iPods or anything else "i" comes with a sticker that looks like an apple.
   Oh! That is what that sticker means. Now it all makes sense.
    Yes. Yes. Glad I can help.



I am so tired of boys right now. I have like 9 boys who are like in love with me right now. It is so exhausting.

Mr. Dark, if you walk barefoot outside is it true that you get parasites?
Only in really dirty situations, places where there are livestock on occasion, or third world countries.
What about here at school?
I would probably say no.
But that's not what so in so said.
He should check his info. 
So, I will get parasites by not wearing shoes....

  I had each of my students write with pencil for their exams because most use use their pen to make modern art not answer exam questions. Often times, I need my Captain Crunch Decoder Ring to figure out what is written. Please know that there was instant gnashing of teeth and grumbling straight out of the Egyptian wilderness.And then came this conversation.

Mr. Dark, is a mechanical pencil a pencil?
Yes.
So, I can use it?
Yes, of course.
(To everyone)Make sure each of you have a pencil. You're not allowed to use a pen.
So, I can't use a mechanical pencil.
A mechanical pencil is a pencil.
But you said we had to use a pencil.
I did.
So, is a mechanical pencil a pencil
Yes.

(Repeat the above several times with several different students who sat quietly staring at you while you had the above conversation.)

Want to know what I did my Spanish speech today, Mr. Dark?
Sure.
I talked about Uruguay (pronounced as Urgay by this student) in Spanish today.
I think it is pronounced Uruguay.
Whatever, I'm not good at that Spanish stuff anyway...

Hope you're having a wonderful Saturday and Sunday.

Happy Reading,

    David

Monday, December 12, 2011

A NaNoWriMo Update



   So November is over and so is the 2011 Edition of NaNoWriMo. On a national and international level, it was a grand success, but close to home it was an abysmal failure. I was even a member of a NaNoWriMo club here at the school I teach at and two of the members wrote even more than they needed to, but truth be told, I did not even come close to winning. To be blunt, I lost. Big Time. I was like LeBron in the last NBA Finals, except I didn't look good doing it and I didn't get to keep my sponsor (my imaginary sponsor). The goal was to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. I didn't even get close.

   Writing takes time and in November it seemed like my time dried up faster than rubbing alcohol. I started off strong. I began writing a story that has been sitting in my head for awhile. I titled it, The Patriarch, and wrote about 3000 words and then came to a place where thinking time was needed. The whole story and the plot of it needed to be boiled down and dissected to see what was I going to really say and why was I going to try and say it. Several days went by and not a another word had been written and I found myself about 8000 words behind, so I panicked and went to a story that has made an appearance here at HTH, A Workman's Dream, and wrote on it some more, but found myself asking the same questions of myself. And once again, I found myself far, far below where I was supposed to be with my word count. I, then, looked up from this and it was already November 18th. And this is where things really fell apart. I then made myself a grand plan for my greatest wordy comeback and Fall Break was when I was going to do so. However, life and everything else had much different plans for me as usual.

  We got out for Thanksgiving Break (Fall Break) on the 18th. I was going to try and write like a crazy man or Jack Kerouac for the next 9 or so days. That plan lasted until 4:00 pm when I arrived home to survey my home and my list that I had made for us to get ready for my family to come for Thanksgiving. I still had some hope in this plan until Saturday when the grocery shopping alone took 4 hours. Then the plan went to the extreme back-burner, but I was still believing that I could just let both stories mull around in my brain and then when my family had packed up and left, then I would just practice some literary regurgitation. But as you can see, is not what happened.

  So...long story short is this. I was a participant of the 2011 edition of NaNoWriMo. I was supposed to write a 50,000 word novel. I wrote around 15,000 words on two separate stories. I will finish them, but they need time. One of my many faults is that I need to see the purpose in doing something. This sounds like it should be a strength, but trust me, it is a fault. I wanted to write 50,000 words. I even tried to do so, but they just wouldn't come. I wanted to really jump head first into the "literary abandon", but just couldn't do it. I guess for now, I will just take comfort in that Norman Maclean was 70 when he published, A River Runs Through It, and it is one of the best books I have ever read. It was his first and almost his only. I will write a novel, but it is going to take some time. The words have to be more than just words. The plot has to be more than just something I am rewriting that I have read or seen elsewhere.

  I will participate in the 2012 edition of NaNoWriMo, but think I'd better get planning now in order to have my brain ready this time. You should too.

David

Saturday, December 10, 2011

2011 Foot Locker Cross Country Championship


Watch live streaming video from flcc_sd at livestream.com


 Not too much to say. I coach cross country. Have been doing so for the past six years now. Love the sport. Think it can get no better. Have an ex-runner in this race. Coached her at the last school I worked at. Wish her (Grace Tinkey) the best of luck and Providence in the race. This race is very important. Whomever ends up racing here usually ends up being the next pro runners that make their way onto the national and international scene. Ryan Hall, Meb K., Jorre Torres, Alan Webb, Kara Goucher, Dathan Ritzenhein, etc all raced here and have gone on to become larger than life and to have great impact on the running community at large. It is the biggest XC race in the country and the only true national championship decided by the participants performances alone. Watch the race! Watch the future of running. I am.

Happy Racing,
  David

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

The 1st Annual Earn Your Turkey...Trot Recap and Results




   Ever since I have gotten back into running, I have really wanted to participate in what is known as a Turkey Trot. A Turkey Trot is a race held on Thanksgiving Day that can be a variety of distances, but it usually is a 10k. The most popular of these is the venerable Manchester Road Race and the Atlanta Half Marathon. However, I have never been in the right place.
  
   So, I decided to do something about it and made the bold decision to host my own Turkey Trot. Once the decision was made all I needed was a course and some runners. My family had come into town for the Thanksgiving week and were up for a run, so they gave me my needed racers. And my wife Mel had charted out a pretty good 3 mile course around our neighborhood that didn't include the things that normally make their way onto a David Dark certified course (traffic, hills galore, shady individuals, vacant, condemned homes,  stray dogs, alleys, etc.), so I took some of that course and created a scenic, spectator-friendly, mostly flat (one big hill) , mostly traffic-free 1.5 mile course. So, now I had my course. All I needed now was for Thanksgiving morning to arrive and bring with it some good weather.
    Thanksgiving morning arrived with some gorgeous Fall weather and I woke up at around 8 am ready to officiate and race my very first Turkey Trot. I loaded up a gallon ziplock with White Lilly ( White Lilly if you would like to sponsor next year's race, just call) flour, laced up my Nike Air Pegasus +28's, grabbed my favorite nephew, Eddy IV, stretched, and headed out the door. We jogged the race course and marked the course at every turn with the flour. The course was now marked and we were very warmed up.
    The race was supposed to begin by 9:30 am, but many of the participants hadn't arrived by then. So, we waited!The weather for the race could not have been any better. By 9:45, everyone (11.5 participants!) had arrived, stretched, received race instructions, and lined up at the start where I explained the route again and told them I expected a clean race because my sister in law and my father were already jockeying for position with a little elbow action. I jumped to the back of the racers and gave them a three command start and we all took off.
   Emily and Eddy IV took early leads and stayed in the lead till we reached the first incline and Emily backed off, but Eddy IV continued to the top where he tapered off a little. I was running in third place followed by the other racers. I took the lead at around a half mile, but Eddy IV and his mother were close on my heals followed by Eddy III and Emily. We all hit the killer hill that is Buford Place and all of our paces really went down, but we all showed vast amounts of courage as we conquered the hill or mountain depending on how you look at it or where you are from. (It just may be 100 feet taller than the highest point in Florida.)
   At the halfway point of the race (this is hearsay and would not hold up in court according to L&O), I was in the lead, followed by Eddy IV, Amy II, Emily, Eddy III, Mel, Mom, Dad, and then the peloton: Forrest, Amy, and Celia. And this is where the race fell apart. The race director and his helper did not put an arrow pointing through Hines Terrace and expected people to keep going straight, but alas they did not. Places 1-3 raced the entire course. Places 4-5 cut through the Vineville Baptist parking lot and then came out on Hines Terrace. Places 6-11 thought they were supposed to turn (also hearsay) onto Hines Terrace and did so.
   Overall, the 1st Annual Earn Your Turkey...Trot was a grand success. I will be hosting another one next year on the same course, but with better markings. And maybe extending it to be a full-fledged 5k. And hopefully, we will again finish to a wonderful breakfast of brown sugar sausage, french toast casserole, and all you can drink juice and coffee like we did this year! First place received the job of being the grand marshal of the Thanksgiving dinner line and Eddy IV won those honors. He finished in a time of 13:52. and the other results are as follows:

Females:

  1st place female age group 5-8: Emily Dark
  1st place female age group 20-24: Celia Bass
  1st place female age group 25-29: Melissa Dark and Zygote
  2nd Place female age group 25-29: Amy Bass
  1st place female age group 35-39: Amy Dark 
  1st place female 55-59: Susan Dark

Males:

   1st place male age group 9-14: Eddy Dark IV
   1st place male age group 25-29: Forrest Bass
   1st place male age group 30-34: David Dark
   1st place male age group 35-39: Eddy Dark III 
   1st place age group 60-64: Ed Dark, Jr.
 

Eddy IV making a very brave case for 2nd place followed by Amy Dark, my brother's wife, who would come in 3rd place overall, but 1st female finisher.


Emily Dark showing us that running the tangents during a race is an old wives tale and that having fun during a race outweighs a medal any day of the week. She is followed by my brother Eddy who is looking strong as he rounds the bend about a half mile into the race.


Emily making a strong surge towards the finish line and a very hot breakfast of French Toast casserole.


Happy Racing,

   David

Sunday, December 4, 2011

A New Frame of Mind



      Jack is tired. It has been a rough and very busy several months for us all; especially Jack. Life has swallowed him whole and spit him out. He is weighed down by all the cares of the family. So many worries, so little time. And no rest for the weary. When he watched, A Few Good Men, and Jack Nicholson shouted to him that he couldn't handle the truth, he shook his head in agreement. He hates the truth. And like Jack, the staff here at Hines Terrace Herald is tired too. The world has gotten us down. We just don't know if we are coming or going. Seems like every facet of life has gotten busier and busier and we lay down at night exhausted, but not finished. And then comes the dreaming these strange dreams about being chased and not being able to move or showing up to a race and everyone has already taken off and you are the last to start and you run and run and never catch up with even the slowest participants. So it has comes time for an A&E style intervention for the staff at HTH and we have a clear choice to make.

  We know the stats. Page views aren't high and we know why. It is hard to read the same post thats been sitting there for weeks. To be honest, the amount of posts have been in a steady state of decline since May. June and July maxed out at 5, August and September maxed out at 6, and the writers here at HTH went into hiding, but managed to churn out a measly five posts for two months. If there were money involved, heads would roll, as the saying goes, but there isn't. And all of our excuses just don't sound adequate. And to top it off, if I did just go out and say a simple, "I'm sorry", I feel you, my dear readers, would just look at me and say, "Sorry's not enough this time....".

    So, we have had staff meeting overload and spent hours upon hours discussing all the things that would have better been left on a bullet point memo and we have come to some office-wide conclusions:

    1. We love having this blog and writing for it.

    2. We really desire to keep the blog up to date.

    3. We have set our turnout expectations too high.(171 posts in two years. 92 in the current year alone.)

    4. We feel very bad and completely rotten when we have to let the blog sit on the bottom of our to-do list.

    5. We have come up with several good resolutions:

  • The staff here at HTH is going to do our very best to churn out ONE post a week, no matter what.
  • Some weeks we will do multiple posts, but we will pull out all the stops to guarantee one post a week. It is the best we can do. It is the least we can do.
     So, I realize you guys may not want to know the inner workings of things here at HTH, but we really appreciate our followers and don't want to lose them because life gets so busy. Thanks for reading. We hope you keep it up and leave us a comment from time to time to let us know how we are doing.


David